7/22/2007

Motor Cycle Gangs Overrun Hudson: Updates

Motorcyle madness has awaken fears and paranoia in the sleepy little town of Hudson, Wisconsin, a small town on the St. Croix River borderline of Minnesota and Wisconsin. It like only yesterday, the only noise coming from Hudson was the sound of property taxes shooting skyward and belching of bureaucrats of the building of a pukeatorium at the end of the dike. Those days are now lost like a butterfly fart in a hurricane. Over night, Hudson has been over run by fierce, outlaw gangs of burly bikers -- and that's just the girls. Suddenly motorcycle colors are suddenly everywhere in Hudson turning the town into a veritabler gay pride parade from Hell. The Hudson city council has pledge to bring back law and order to this once decent town -- even if they have to triple property taxes.

In order to keep you up-to-date on the motorcycle violence and mayhem hanging over Hudson like a Hiroshima dust cloud of despair, we here at ATBL will be posting up-to-the-minute news updates on what has transpired in the motorcycle madness thundering throughout the St. Croix River Valley.

Below are reports of this weekend's outlaw motorcycle gang attacks report. Rumour has it the Mayor Jack of Hudson is in secret negotiations with local motorcycle gangs and is trying to strike a compromise that allows the outlawed bikers to hold their meeting on the failed sea wall. More on that later.

Below outlaw bikers are seen crashing a party being hosted by former members of the Somerset police force and some nuns who recently returned from a road trip to Sturgis, South Dakota.



Mayor Jack working his way through the city hall parking lot to get to his reserved parking spot for the regular council meeting. This picture is especially telling, considering the main agenda topic for the meeting is the expansion of the city sewer treatment plant. The picutre on the bottom right shows Mayor Jack passing a news tip to his pet reporter Meg Hotone.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well if the bikers didn't have a problem in town before they will now. I ride the river quiet alot and have never experienced any problems at all - but with writings like this out to scare everyone in town I'm sure this season will be different. Thanks for nothing.
Stroke

Sunny Badger said...

Yo Stroke:

If you know the story behind this, you'll understand the satire.

Anonymous said...

this is extremely funny, got a great laugh reading this. S.Y.L.O Smiley

Anonymous said...

I was there. I saw the mayhem - it was incredible. they're right the town will never be the same!! don't know how it could all the destruction and rampant unrulyness. It was AWESOME...

S.Y.L.O.