Mr. Peanut Wins Coveted " Goodman" Award - Beats Stiff Competition

During a ceremony held in his own mind, Mr. Peanut was awarded coveted
"Goodman Award" for outstanding goodness and watchdoggedness.
The judges took special note of Mr. Peanut's frequent and eloquent school board
meeting speeches that championed the cause of the hundreds of taxpayer and local
concerned citizens. Judges also recommended that the Vatican should be petitioned
to begin the process of Mr.Peanuts canonization into sainthood.

Congress Gives "Big Oil" a Taste of It's Own Medicine

AP reports:

WASHINGTON - Declaring a new direction in energy policy, the House on Saturday approved $16 billion in taxes on oil companies, while providing billions of dollars in tax breaks and incentives for renewable energy and conservation efforts.

Republican opponents said the legislation ignored the need to produce more domestic oil, natural gas and coal. One GOP lawmaker bemoaned "the pure venom ... against the oil and gas industry."

The House passed the tax provisions by a vote of 221-189. Earlier it had approved, 241-172, a companion energy package aimed at boosting energy efficiency and expanding use of biofuels, wind power and other renewable energy sources.

Halliburton Awarded No Bid Contract to Rebuild Nations Bridges

President Bush announced today his administration would be awarding Hallibuton a $65 Billion no bid contract to repair or replace the nation's 156,000 structurally deficient bridges.
Vice President Chaney when asked for his reaction to the no bid contracts being let to the company where he was formerly CEO was quoted as saying "Yippie! Our years of neglecting the country's infrastructure has finally paid off, (handsomely)"


The Real Story:USA Today

"During a 2005 inspection, the I-35W bridge, which was built in 1967, was rated "structurally deficient" and possibly in need of replacement, according to a federal database. The span rated 50 on a scale of 120 for structural stability in that review, White House press secretary Tony Snow said."

"Of the country's nearly 600,000 bridges, 26% were found structurally deficient or "functionally obsolete" in a 2006 U.S. Department of Transportation report. The condition of heavily used urban bridges like the one that collapsed this week is even worse: one in three are classified as aging or unable to accommodate modern vehicle weights and traffic volume."

Three Anti-CAFTA Republicans Have Road Projects Slashed

National Journal's CongressDailyPM
August 05, 2005
by Darren Goode
Three House Republicans who loudly opposed the Central America Free Trade Agreement saw their highway projects cut as much as 70 percent, based on figures in the recently passed surface transportation reauthorization conference report. GOP leaders said they held off a vote on the highway bill to squeeze out support for CAFTA, which passed by two votes last week despite 27 GOP defections.

Two of the loudest defectors -- Reps. Virgil Goode of Virginia and Walter Jones of North Carolina -- had their "high-priority" highway projects cut by more than 70 percent from the House-passed bill. Rep. Gil Gutknecht, R-Minn., who also was an outspoken opponent of CAFTA, had his projects cut by more than half, all well above the average 20 percent average cut for rank-and-file House members. Goode said the House voted on CAFTA around midnight July 27 "and the next morning we looked through the transportation bill and saw that my projects had been cut 76 percent -- and that's all I know."

"Stupid" Quotes

"Weese spoke again at the end of the meeting, citing his frustration with everything from administrators being seated with the board at meetings to making him wait until the end of a meeting to speak. Weese went on to call several board members and administrators “stupid” and left the meeting without waiting for board member response."

HSO

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You can't stare at it long, it's too risky. You get a sense of it then you look away.

Jerry Seinfield

Republican Cleavage Sighting...

Mr. & Mrs. Fred Thompson

Remember the Good Ol' Days...

Building Political Networks On The Borderline

Click pictures to enlarge...

WMD -- Is Not a Wine

"Not only did the U.S. and UN inspectors fail to find those "weapons of mass destruction": in his hour of need, apparently Saddam Hussein couldn't find them either."

Joe Sobran

Town Crybaby Blames Bad Luck Numbers for Personal Failures

Quotes from TownCrybaby:
"Our team had seven players and as luck would have it, I never played one minute of a game over four years."
"It just occurred to me that for me the number two really is bad luck. Not only is it the favorite number of the Superintendent who has taken a deuce on our money which has dwindled my bank account down to $2 and it also is the repeated number that was on my basketball jersey and it is the number of ex-wives I have."


Boo Hoo Crybaby. Maybe if you'd learn to play basketball and treat people better "2 " would bring you good luck!

Bikers Create Business Partnership With Local Vandals

Help Wanted:

Local Biker Gang seeks youthful offenders with spray painting experience
to customizes member bikes.
Must be able to work late hours in poor lighting conditions.
Having poor judgement and lack of repect for property a plus.
Interested applicants can call 1-800-Biker1 to schedule and interview.
Remember to bring your portfolio with spray painting examples.