Hurry, Supplies Are Limited

The Badger Blogger Alliance First Annual Blog Fest is just around the corner, and what would a Wisconsin outdoor blog fest be without the indulgence of devoring dozens of BloggerLager soaked Badger Blogger Brats. If you muttered "UNTHINKABLE" you are absolutely right.
But behind all the good times to be had there's danger lurking.
As red blooded conservative right wingnut citizens, we can never forget that any gathering that includes more people than me, myself and I is a Socialist attempt to lessen our freedoms as sovereign individuals and a ride down the slippery slope toward the confiscation of all private property by the statist moonbats.
Think you can light up the grill and not have some liberal tree hugger tell you you're melting the polar icecaps? Well think again.
Like anything "public" event, there's always the threat of contracting a "Social" disease.
That's why the Blogger Alliance has introduced the "Blogger Brat Brander" (TM), to help set your mind at ease while attending a "social" event like the Blog Fest/Brat and Weinnie roast.
You never know when some communicable disease carrying pervert might disquise himself as the Bratmeister and intentionally infect you and your family with some incurable malady.
When you indulge in a Badger Blogger Brat you want to be absolutely, positively sure it's the same 100% USDA Government inspected Spotted Horsemeat brat you brought with you with you and
personally laid on the sizzling coals. With the "Blogger Brat Brander" there's never any doubt.
Just heat your personalized "Blogger Brat Brander" iron to a temperature of 911 degrees Farenheit, and make your mark on your meal. There will be no doubt that the Brat you brought is the brat you devor.
The Blogger Brat Brander is enthusiasically endorsed by the Dr.s of Liberty from
ontheborderline.net. Just ask Dr. Bill, Dr. Bubonic, or Admin Chris if they've ever contracted
a "social" disease from Brat consumption, since they starting using the "Blogger Brat Brander".
You'll be reassured to hear the response of, "Of course not you fricken idiot" from each and every
one of them.
To order your personalized "Blogger Brat Brander" send $29.95 in gold coin or gold backed currency
to:
Brat Fest Brander $29.95 Offer
1776 Stone Pine Ave.
Hudson, WI, 54016

Order before midnight, and you get a complimentary "Lil' Bill" Weinnie iron for the kids.
Don't delay, supplies are limited.