10/07/2006

Dr. Pat- Androgynous Coward - Shares Foot Fungus Secrets















I was reading my favorite FruitCake Journal, ontheborderline.nut, recently and was really overwhelmed with the depth and breath of knowledge that I learned by design rather than accident from that repository of genius. It never ceases to amaze me how the intellectigent Dr.s of Liberty know so much, and even more astounding, they are willing to share it with the world.
Here's one recent post for example:

Cowards are we?
Filed under: General, Humor --- Jack Junior @ 12:42 am
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Just a few weeks ago I said “I will never fly again” with all the ridiculous restrictions. Plus, what I really hated was taking off your shoes and wallk bare footed across tiled floors already walked on by many with numerous foot fungus deseases. At that time. when I said I would never fly again I was thinking about vacations and a choice to fly. Well, as fate has it, I had to fly to Florida to see my father in a nursing home.

So what to do about the foot problem? I went to many stores to find disposable footware, as once you go through, you must dispose of slippers etc. I found, at Walmart, shower caps, 15 for .97 cents. They fit on your foot just fine, looks stupid but does the job. In Mpls. airport, they just looked and told me I had to put them in waste basket after I went through the x-ray machine, which was fine with me, as I did not plan to wear them again as a shower cap. But in Florida, I asked where the waste basket was, they took the shower caps and saved them in a basket way beyond the waste basket. I should have asked them what they planned on doing with them, or why they saved them.

Your socks are not fine, as they absorb the sweat from your feet, you walk on the tiled floor filled with foot fungus, then put your shoes back on and welcome to your new home, Foot Fungus.

To rid yourself of athletes foot, foot fungus, try putting 1 tsp. of Borax in your socks each day. A tried and true treatment. It works. It is a cheap and reliable treatment. Buy it in the grocery store. Put it on your ant hills, it will kill ants too. Put it in your laundry, a booster. Guess that it is what it is really for.

Orange Alert=Foot Fungus. They throw away lotions, gels, toothpaste, but let you walk on their infected floor. It is a challenge to all to use all your brains to get through the gates. The terrorists have gainned their way, they have terrorized and we are giving in to them. Remember when Bush-(whacker) said after 911, “just go on living the way you did, do not give in to them? Well, we did, put your under lotions, gels etc., in a quart size plastic bag place your shoes, your jacket, your carry on in the basket.

Okay, once more, I will never fly again! ! !

That might just be a foot in the mouth statement again, but at least my foot will not have fungus.

One Response to “Cowards are we?”


1. BobZiller Says:
October 7th, 2006 at 11:35 am

Thanks for the tips, Pat. Here I thought I was protected by wearing my socks through security. Oh, by the way have a little respect for the president of the U. S.–Bush-(whacker????

Think things are bad now? Wait until the first terrorist A-bomb goes off in the U. S. You’ll settle for foot fungus.

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The Twenty Mule Team Dr.s probably didn't notice Dr. Ziller's slip of the keyboard when he inadertantly revealed Jack Jr.'s identity. But heck, "When you have Borax on the mind, it's hard to think of anything else!"





















So let's sum up what we've learned today from the Dr.s at ontheborderline.nut!

1. Jack Junior" s cover has been blown- now we know It's Pat, the androgenous Saturday
Night Live Character.

2. If you want to look stupid (and save money) going through airport security, always shop at Wal-Mart for your shower cap/stocking needs.

3. Put Twenty Mule Team Borax in you sox, -EVERYDAY- It keeps the fungus away.

4. If you do get a fungus, be sure to comment at ontheborderline.nut and be sure to put your foot in your mouth.

And last but not least:

5. Never fly again!!!!!!

And they say an education can't be free?

4 comments:

The queen of clean said...

You'd think they would have invented a 21 century Borax by now?

Bauer buster said...

Jack Junior's wondering aloud to Dr. Z....Who's Pat??????

Sounds like somebody who just got caught with their hand in the cookee jar....

CANRAC said...

I'm still trying to understand why an Illinois resident is taking much time to analyze the Wisconsin governors race. I think he'd be more interested in the Illinois race.

Then again, there is help available for those who live in denial over where they actually live, or the fact that very few miss them in the community they used to live in.

The Pat thing is great, BobZ obviously had a slip of the keyboard. Do you think there might have been a few screaming emails over that one?

SNL said...

CANRAC:

This much we know. The former Hudson resident formerly known as donttreadonme bloviates ad nausium on the formerly ultra chic giga hit blog
we fondly refer to as ontheborderline.nut and continues to keep his out of state whereabouts a mystery (Mississippi? Illinois, Hayward? who cares?) but also continues to pontificate about Hudson WI,wingnut politics no matter where he finds himself.
Dontreadonme is a cyberfiction character who simply enjoys the attention he gets from being psuedo intellectigent.