Congressional Steroid Hearings Continue

A candidate for Hudson mayor provided testimony to a congressional committee investigating the use of steroids by campaign signs. The candidate pointed his finger at the committee members and adamantly stated: "My signs have never used steroids. Period. I don't know how to say it any more clearly than that. Never. Ever. Period." Senator Feingold (D-WI) questioned the candidate on why his signs needed a post-and-beam substructure to hold them aloft. The candidate answered: "My signs have achieved their robust size by maintaining a strict cross-training regimen and ingesting high-protein shakes. There has been no use of performance-enhancing drugs." Senator Kohl (D-WI) questioned whether the signs need to be so large in order to be effective. The candidate explained, "This is the new world order for campaign signs. What was once considered an effective size, is now considered puny. We've just raised the bar." Several of the 100-plus signs around Hudson were asked to comment, but they chose to let their 15,860 pt.-font letters speak for themselves.


















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