Bloggers Make Plans To Attend This Summer's Get Away!

Fellow Bloggers:

Once again it's time for you to mark your calendar for the biggest blogging event in the state of Wisconsin. We know most of you borderline bloggers have spent the winter wearing the backside of you boxer shorts out in the basement, ignoring your family and attacking your neighbors. Now it's time to totally make them all happy and leave town for a few days.

This year's line up of workshops and events is even bigger that last year.

Start this big day out at the Intimidation Station. Get the last updates on proper late night anonymous phone calling and threat letter writing. Uncontrollable rage and a half-cocked ego are a terrible thing to waste.

Later join your fellow bloggers in a pity party discussing why you shouldn't have to attend court-ordered anger management classes and walk around town with a monitoring braclet.

Get beauty tips on how not to get those permanent evil wrinkles from being constantly pissed off at everybody who doesn't agree with you, i.e., everybody in the state not attending the day's event.

Our third workshop will discuss the pitfalls that most wing nuts bloggers fall into. We will learn about the "stupidity trap" that overcomes unemployed bloggers who spend too much time discussing the theory of creating wealth during the middle of the day while their significant other is out actually creating wealth. Learn neat ways to make people think you actually work for a living when you don't.


If you make it through these three sessions, you are entitled to a little fun. We will break up into teams of two and put our intimidation, anger and stupidity skills to use in practical, physical ways.
You will also get your chance to put your intimidation, anger and stupidity skills to use on our session on how to talk to the weasels your encounter in the local media. It will help you to succeed in this class if you remember that the local media make way less than those working in government positions but way more than those of you pretending you are unemployed entrepreneurs during the day.


---
And don't forget! Don't go green, get mean!!!

Patrick Henry College: Home schooled Neo-Con Training Ground

The Bible College That Leads to the White House

The campus is immaculate, everyone is clean-cut and cheerful. But just what are they teaching at Patrick Henry College? And why do so many students end up working for George Bush?

Michael Farris, a constitutional lawyer and general counsel of the Home School Legal Defense Association, founded the school in 2000 as a "Christian college blending classical instruction with apprenticeship methodology." It prides itself on the high number of White House internships secured by its students, whose SAT scores average over 1300.
Recent Internships Include the Following Offices & Organizations

But when 30% of you faculty resigns over issues of academic freedom, would you guess there
may be an administrative problem? Not if you Patrick Henry College, a school that's become the "ivy league" for home schoolers.

"A contentious debate at Patrick Henry College that began over theological differences, the interpretation of Scripture, and academic freedom has prompted 5 of the school's 16 full-time faculty members to announce they will not be returning to the conservative, Christian college next year. The announcements bring the total number of departing professors to nine in the past year, not including two adjuncts, as well as four senior executives who left in the past 18 months, departing professors say."
See Christianity Today Article:

The Lifeboat
The debate reached a head when Root published an article entitled "Of St. Augustine, the Teacher, and Politics" in the campus publication The Source. The piece argued that St. Augustine "deserves to be called a Saint because he was instrumental in making political philosophy palpable to Christians and vice versa. … [He] taught Christians how to engage the culture around them."

Soon after its publication, Root learned his contract was being "temporarily withdrawn" based on the article as well as a complaint from a student's parent over his use of the "lifeboat example" in class. Root said the illustration was used to explain Thomas Hobbes's state of nature argument. "Acting academic dean [Marian Sanders] told me I couldn't use that any more," said Root. "She said that there are some questions we can't ask in class or entertain."

College President says St. Augustine is in Hell:

According to "resigning" faculty:

Farris, a Baptist minister, (and president of Patrick Henry College) has publicly expressed views that have shocked some professors and students.
"He said St. Augustine was in hell," said Root. "I heard it with my own ears." Other professors and students said Farris has repeatedly disparaged Calvinist theology.


COLLEGE RESPONSE TO MEDIA REPORTS ABOUT DEPARTING FACULTY
(complete with "Talking Points")

Talking Point #4
4. One of the departing professors was dismissed, after announcing his resignation, for subsequently involving students in his classroom in a debate over faculty departures. This professor was asked to discontinue inappropriate, unprofessional classroom conduct and apologize; he refused.

What one Patrick Henry Student thinks of the curriculum.

Dear Diary,

"I sure am learning a lot about government. Mistrusting the government, overthrowing the government, why the government is too intrusive unless it's restricting something you don't like—college is opening up my mind to a lot of new ideas! (Did you know that the Constitution requires a separation of church and state? I always thought this was something the public school kids made up.) "

Jimmy Carter Gets Lashed To The Swift Boat

Here's an interesting link from one of our readers. Let's see, Jimmy Carter left the White House in 1981 and now, 25 years later, the right-wing nuts are giving him the Swift Boat treatment. Remember the day Reagan was inaugurated? He Iranian hostages were released minutes after took his oath. Remember the "October surprise?"

The October Surprise Conspiracy was an alleged plot that claimed representatives of the 1980 Ronald Reagan presidential campaign had conspired with Islamic Republic of Iran to delay the release of 66 Americans held hostage in Tehran until after the 1980 U.S. Presidential election. In exchange for their cooperation, the United States would supply weapons to Iran as well as unfreeze Iran's monetary assets being held by the US government.

Read more: October Surprise Conspiracy.

An add is now running urging the censure of Jimmy Carter. It looks to me like a pre-2008 shot at Senator Feingold, who has called for the censure of President Bush. Put out by a group called Move America Forward, it looks like they actually want to move America backward...to the stone age. Carter's attempts to work at bringing peace to troubled spots in the world gets him on this group's "Hall of Shame." There were no pictures of Rumsfelt and Saddam Hussein. It appears that to build up the war mongers you have to put down the peace makers. I guess all those things that used to make us proud to be Americans have been replaced the ease-dropping, Abugrab-loving, pro-domestic-spying, freedom-loving patriots who firmly believe it's their way of the highway.

See the ad and check out the story at Crooks and Liars.

Letter To This Summer's HSO Intern

We received this letter from Miss Clark, 2005 summer intern for thed HSO, and she asked if we would published for this summer's intern. You'll recall that last summer Ms. Clark uncovered a vast conspiracy that has captivated at least six of the thousands of people living in the quite St. Croix river valley. The six people are all members of Internet blog group know as the On The Border Line Six. The six prefer the name 6OTBL'ers, because they have a real hard time coherently putting together a six word sentence with out inserting the names Ludiwg von Mises or Ayn Rand.

Clark's investigative reporting brought her in contact with gnostic cults, Egyptian sun worshippers, UFOs, the Rothschild banking firm, Pat Robertson, the Ku Klux Klan and two guys who left the school board meeting early. Her efforts to bring the facts of this story to light brought her ridicule and scorn from a tremendous number of members of the sleepy village of Hudson -- at least six of them anyways. What follows is Miss Clark letter to the new intern to help that person understand what awaits them and to hopefully put an end to the rumors and gossip that has permeated the valley like skunk odor.

Dear 2006 HSO Intern:

When I first arrived in Hudson to start my internship at the HSO, I felt scared and almost like an innocent lost sheep. But the valley is so beautiful and the people -- all but six of them -- were so friendly, I knew my internship would be a fun, learning experience and would be an important building block to help me in my journalism career.

After finding an apartment that would take me and my little dog too, I unpacked my things and reported to the HSO office to start my internship. Even though I had an up-to-date road atlas, I quickly realized that I wasn't in Kansas anymore...



I know people think that a glamorous job little being a summer intern at the HSO must pay billions of dollars, but that's not the case. By the end of the summer I had learned that trying to get an extra dollar from the Holy Scared Oracle management team is probably almost as hard as it is to get a tax dollar from an OTBL'er. In fact, I quickly learned that they expected me to get hopping right away and my pay would keep me a vegetarian throughout the summer.

Right off the bat, Meg, the veteran reporter, took me under her wing and filled me in on the details of life in the valley. The way she explained things was so enchanting. See told me, if I ever had problems, just go down on Second St., look the the West and go hit happy hour at Dick's. When I asked what good that would do, she smiled and said it was a hell of a lot better that closing your eyes, clicking your Nike's together and hoping to wake up in Kansas. I would soon find out that she was correct. And of course, all the staff at the HSO were so helpful: Doug, Maggie, everybody and even old Willis -- and he's so old he squeaks worse that the Tin Man!

After the school board exit, the borderline monkeys went ape poop and tore the stuffing out of many good citizens. This behavior
continued right on through the school board elections. For the most part, the borderline bloggers had a total melt down and didn't know witch end was up. After the school board meetings, when I went back to the office to type up my story on the meeting, I made up so really interesting lyrics for a Johnny Paycheck song. I retitled the song "Duct Tape This Job And Stick It." By nature I shy, so you'll have to take my word that the words get really good about three hours into Dick's Happy Hour.

The usually international intrigue surrounding the city-school-police Gordian triangle of community conspiracy continued to dominate school board politics as city workers continued to pick up signs to close to the road. After their school board candidate disappeared on the vote-count radar screen, the borderlines continued to be silent about the antics of the President they supported so vigorously. Now are positioning themselves to eat their own. They have started bashing the G-O-Pee Party and local elected state officials Kitty Litter and Shifty Shelia.

So remember dear 2006 HSO intern, the most important tip I can give you on surviving your sentence at the HSO is to remember that Happy Hour at Dick's begins at 5 PM. If you're like me, you will switch to the public relations track in your journalism school next Fall semester.

Sincerely,
Miss Clark

PS: "Love" isn't the four-letter word that comes into my mind when I'm think on the borderline.

Quote to Ponder: All Years of Schooling Are Not Equal

"Almost every economic and social policy analyst recommends improved education, especially for low-income groups, as one of the surest ways to achieve shared prosperity. There is a question, however, of whether new jobs require higher skills or whether the availability of better-educated workers enables employers to hire them for jobs requiring less education. Confusion over the relationship between education and economic outcomes results in part from using years of schooling as a measure of educational achievement (i.e., skills and knowledge). Obviously, all years of schooling are not equal. There often are very different outcomes when educational achievement is measured by objective achievement assessments and compared with economic performance or social pathologies. It also clearly makes a difference what kinds of knowledge and skills people have, not how many years they spend in school."

Ray Marshall
Former US Secretary of Labor

A Year Of Blogging...

It's interesting to see how far this blogging business has gone over the past year. There's a lot of motion but not much momentum. There's more warts than beauty marks. To my OTBL friends I will say once again, you guys make better waiters than customers; you can dish it out, but you can't take it!

Read the rest of the sory...read on.

N.Onimous Posts His Vision For Future

Now this is Real Comedy (NOT)

From ontheborderline.com where you learn more by design.

114,782 Braziers
Filed under: Humor --- N. Onimous @ 10:58 am
__________________________________________________________________

Organizer #1: Dude, you know what we should do?

Organizer #2: What?

Organizer #1: We should totally, like, get a bunch of bras and hook them together for breast cancer
awareness.
Organizer #2: Didn't Singapore already do that?

Organizer #1: Yeah, but, like, we can do it BIGGER. And stuff.

Organizer #2: Sweeeeeeeeet.

Organizer #1: Totally.




So.... The question became does the thought of 115,000 bras all hooked together get you motivated? No. But the idea of 115,000 unhooked? .... Now that's a horse of a different color.


Who says we don't need more room at the Middle School?
Save a chair for N. Onimous.

Borderline Health Update: Don't Forget You Annual Check

Coming Soon To A Borderline Theater Near You...

On This Date in 1972:

George W. Bush went AWOL
Is There Really A Liberal Media News Bias?

George W. Bush received favoritism to get into the National Guard (at a time when 100,000 were on the waiting list), left his National Guard post without leave, violated two direct orders to return, was disciplined for refusing to take a physical exam including a drug test, and did not show up for at least one and probably two years of service.


Read the facts and check the records: George aWol Bush

First Century Christian Teachers Form AEU Local No. 1

Breaking News .....

Teachers of the Christian Gospels in Palestine, Anatonia, Greece and Rome came together to form the initial chapter of the Apostolic Educators Union.

Union Spokesman Brother Timothy explained: "Management at Peter & Paul, Inc. has been demanding overtime without compensation, and expecting Roman persecution without providing adequate health care benefits. Also, the pension plan consists of mauling by wild beasts with mere promises of eternal paradise."

Brother Bartholomew pointed out that, "Compensation is squat compared to the high priest jobs at the oracle temple at Delphi."

The educators negotiated their first contract with management and were satisfied with the results. St. Peter said it was the most brutal experience he's had since that "cock crows - three times thing." St. Paul agreed - saying he would rather be blinded on the road to Damascus than negotiate with labor again anytime soon.

Trent Lott Sues "Good Neighbor"

In 2001 Trent Lott was quite upset about preventing "frivolous lawsuits".
See Article:

"Trent Lott, the Senate Republican leader, said: "My own state of Mississippi has become a mecca for frivolous lawsuits, with unlimited damages. They go into a particular county."

Mr. Lott's brother-in-law, Richard F. Scruggs, who made his name suing asbestos and tobacco manufacturers, is one of the most successful plaintiffs' lawyers in the state. He is leading a team filing national class- action lawsuits in federal courts attacking H.M.O.'s, which he contends coerced doctors to withhold medically necessary treatments promised to patients.

Whether the many lawsuits filed in his state are frivolous, as Mr. Lott contends, is in dispute. But the Circuit Court of Jefferson County in rural southwest Mississippi — one of the poorest counties in one of the nation's poorest states — has indisputably become a popular destination for lawyers suing makers of prescription drugs, cigarettes, lead paint and asbestos products.

In Congress, a major questions is whether a patient should be able to sue a health maintenance organization in state court, federal court or both. H.M.O.'s oppose any expansion of their legal liability, but if forced to choose, they prefer federal court because they believe that large jury verdicts are less likely there."

Fast forward to post Katrina 2006 and Mr. Lott has a different view of what constitutes "frivlous". I think the difference is if someone else is sueing that's frivolous, if Mr. Lott is sueing that's seeking justice.

Lott Sues State Farm

In an ironic twist Lott's brother in law Richard Scruggs is now representing Lott in a class action suit against
State Farm.







From MotherJones:
Any Tort in a Storm By Dave Gilson
May 1, 2006

Over the years, Mississippi senator Trent Lott made a name for himself as an opponent of lawsuit
'abuse," decrying his home state as "the center of jackpot justice" and declaring, "What disgusts me most is the lawyers that the abuse has made super-wealthy." That was then. After Hurricane Katrina ruined his Gulf Coast home, Lott changed his tune, joining thousands of Mississippians in a class-action lawsuit against their insurance companies. The suit is headed by legendary plaintiffs’ lawyer Richard Scruggs, who observed, "Funny how frivolous lawsuits stop being frivolous when it’s you."

One more notch of hypocricy in the Right Wing gun belt.

Li'l Bil Danielson Uncovers 'Perverse Financial Incentive' In Hudson Special Education.

Li'l Bil Danielson on the OTBL blog: "If it is financially advantageous to move students into special education, school systems will seek to influence the rate at which students are diagnosed. The overwhelming majority of the growth in special education has taken place in the most subjective disabilities to diagnose and the cheapest to serve. Hudson has increased the number of special ed kids by well over 120 since 1998. This is a 22% increase in just six years. They went from 558 in 1998 to 678 as of December 1st 2004."

Hey, Dr. Bil-rod, how about this statistic: Actual enrollment for the entire district went from 3,823 to 4,775 from 1998 to 2004 - an increase of 25%!

Sunshine, goldfinches, dandelions and Mother's Day

How many days was it raining? This morning the sun broke through and the dandelions opened up in yellow brilliance and shown like stars in the backyard. With cup of coffee close by and my guitar in hand, I worked through my song book and took into the morning warming up and springing to life just beyond the patio door.

Mother Nature's, with her paint pallet of infinite shades of green, had been busy over the past week. The grass would be cut later in the afternoon and the dandelions would be getting their "haircut." Until it warmed up and dried out, my morning agenda consisted of coffee and folk songs.

The other day I mentioned seeing my first oriole of the season. That's definitely a good sign. This morning I was treated to a visit from a male goldfinch in all his splendor. Hopping around around the dandelions, picking at them and nabbing an occasional bug, the goldfinch provided me with another reminder of one of the joys of spring and early summer.

At my place, we have the variety of lawn -- as my wife learned the other day on the Wisconsin Public Radio garden show -- call "freedom lawn." There's no pesticides, fertilizers or sprinklers used at our place. The lawn does what it does and for the next few weeks the dandelions will be turning from yellow to gray. When the gray hits, the backyard becomes a seed buffet for a variety of birds that include goldfinches, purple finches, bluebirds and a few others stopping by for a snack. It's quite a sight to see those birds just outside the patio door devouring the seeds of a ripe dandelion. It reminds me of how I work my way through a big bowl of ice cream.

My Mother past away 23 years ago and the goldfinch reminded me that the Mother's Day gifts I used to give to my Mom were usually pictures of birds like hawks and owls. For some reason, she liked owls the best. They were usually small pen and ink drawings that were framed and eventually hung on the wall. Even though it's days like today that tend to re-open the wound of sadness that never really heals after the death of one so close as your Mother, I was comforted by the warmth, hope and glory my Mother Nature offered me as I sang "Will The Circle Be Unbroken."

What Is A Teacher?

In today's church bulletin:

What Is A Teacher?

What is a teacher, if not a mirror in which we perceive the divine image hidden in the soul?

What is a teacher, if not a sower of seed and a cultivator of young gardens?

What is a teacher, if not a shaper of souls and guide who gently shows the right path for the journey?

What is a teacher, if not the most hopeful of dreamers, who plants and nurtures and sees the bright destiny and harvest of the work even when the student cannot?

What is a teacher, if not a shepherd watching over the flock and leading it to abundant pastures?

Dreamers and sharers of dreams, sowers of seed and guides who chart the way, mirrors of goodness and shepherds of grace - it is for these teachers and this ministry that we give abundant thanks to God.

Jack Bauer Looms Over New Richmond Superintendent Morrie Veilleux.

New Richmond School District Superintendent Morrie Veilleux is ready to roll up his sleeves and begin work on a building referendum. The New Richmond News reports that under Morrie's leadership three facilities referendums were approved in the Clayton School District. Morrie states that he is up to the job of passing a facilities referendum in New Richmond that's much larger than any he has dealt with in Clayton. “I think I understand the process,” Veilleux said.

Morrie's most constance supporter is 'Jack Bauer' on the OTBL blog. But, dear Jack says: "The only reason to build anything in New Richmond in the near future may be to permanently replace the portable wing at East Elementary."

I see a conflict brewing. If Morrie rolls up his sleeves and tackles the big referendum, will Jack still be his big supporter or, instead, drop him like a hot potato and undermine his efforts??

I'm looking forward to finding out.

Borderwhiners Moving to Dallas! Hudson Rejoices!

N. Onimous on the OTBL blog: "Let's see, it's May 12th with a temperature of 40 degrees with a driving rain storm and some of the highest income and property taxes in the country. While in Dallas, it's 85 degrees and sunny with NO INCOME TAXES! You tell me who has the quality of life!"

Bye guys! We'll miss you (not)!

What You Need To Know To Be A Member Of The John Birch Society Or A Blogger At www.ontheborderline.net -- (now there's an oxymoron!)

1. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals, Arabs, and Hillary Clinton.

2. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney and Rumsfeld did business with him, and a bad guy when Bush couldn't find Bin Laden.

3. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

4. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

5. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches, while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

6. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle and antagonize our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

7. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

8. HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

9. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

10. A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

11. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

12. The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's and Dick Cheney's driving records are none of our business.

13. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.
14. Supporting "Executive Privilege" is imperative for every Republican ever born, who will be born or who might be born in perpetuity.

15. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

Tax Boy Presented With Bumper Sticker!

Tax Boy wins a "Support Hudson Schools" bumper sticker for making the following statement on the OTBL blog:

"And we're out of space for the children."

On behalf of the children, "Thanks" Tax Boy for stressing that point.









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Verizon Gives Phone Records To Big Brother

Here is the standard e-mail response sent out by Verizon today to customers upset that their phone records were turned over to the National Security Agency (NSA):

"Dear Sir,

Verizon appreciates that the media reports about the possibility that the NSA is able to analyze local call data records is causing concern. Please be assured that Verizon places the highest value on protecting the privacy of our customers.

Anything to do with the NSA is highly classified, so I can't comment on whether or not the news article causing concern is even accurate. But I can say that, to the extent that we cooperate with government authorities, we are confident that we are complying with all applicable statutes.

Bob Varettoni
Verizon Media Relations"