Where Does Baby Jesus Go In the "Off Season"?

The Baby Jesus Chronicles

Last weekend in Bellingham, Wash., a Jesus statue was stolen for the third time this year. In Plaistow, N.H., one was plucked from its cradle and replaced with a beer can. Basically, where there's a nativity scene, there's a good chance there'll be a manger kidnapping, and rarely does the baby Jesus get returned. But in Buffalo, N.Y., an 18-inch plastic figurine was stolen 2 days before Christmas, last year, and returned to its owners' doorstep 8 months later, along with a photo album chronicling where he'd been. We investigate.

The letter that was left on the Leising's doorstep with the returned doll:
Dear Residents of Depew Ave and keepers of the Baby Jesus,

Please read this letter in its entirety before passing judgment on the actions and events which have taken place. We are simply a group of young adults who wish to show the baby Jesus a better life than he would have seen cooped up in an attic crawl space. He has traveled over counties and states, seen landmarks and milestones, met people and animals alike. We have done our best to show the baby Jesus the many glorious aspects of our world.

However, now we feel it's time to safely return the baby Jesus back into the arms of his owners. We have done the best possible job we could to keep the baby Jesus safe and in loving arms. Over the course of the last eight months, the baby Jesus has become more to us than simply a plastic religious figure. He has come with us to parties, on camping trips, on college visits, and on multiple summer adventures. The baby Jesus has been with us through thick and thin, happy and sad, good times and bad. Having to say goodbye to the baby Jesus made today a sad day for all of us.

On a more serious note, we meant for this adventure to be in no way either blasphemous or disrespectful. We hope you can view this as an interesting and funny story, to tell at your dinner parties. The baby Jesus has made us happy in numerous times in the past eight months. We hope the chronicles of his life with us can pass some of that happiness on to you.

-Creators of the baby Jesus Chronicles