Sigmund und ze Taxpenis

Thank you for coming Mr. Taxpenis, please lie down on the couch. Yes, I think our psychoanalysis therapy is now complete and I would like to provide you with my considered professional opinion regarding your repressive subconscious. You are certainly a case I will be writing about in my journals for years to come. Quite extraordinary - quite. Such a level of penis envy I have not seen before. Clearly, as you passed through your adolescent phallic development, you encountered emotional trauma only measurable on the richter scale. The focus of your sexual impulses was your mother, however you feared your father and had extreme castration anxiety. You desired your mother yet you identified with a skunk in your backyard instead of your father. You employed your displacement defense mechanism to shift your desires from your mother to hanging around with skunks. You have repressed your Oedipus Complex and have obsessed over the government's taxation of your meager income, which you - only in your dreams - refer to as "wealth." The only cure is to spend all of your waking hours dreaming that you have an eight foot rocket for a penis, and selling holiday nuts. Good luck Mr. Taxpenis. You are going to need it. Oh, and here is my bill. And don't make me send the collection agency after you again you degenerate slug.